Kuba umubyeyi ntibitangirira ku munsi umwana avukira gusa. Ni urugendo rutangirira no mu gihe cyo gutwita, aho umubyeyi agenda yitegura kwakira umwana no kumwitaho.
Uko inda ikura, ni na ko ubushobozi bw’umwana bwo kumva amajwi bugenda butera imbere. Ibi bigatuma ijwi rya nyina n’andi majwi amugeraho bigira uruhare mu kumenyera amajwi yumva akiri mu nda.
Nubwo bimeze bityo, hari ababyeyi batamenya igihe cyiza cyo gutangira kuganiriza umwana uri mu nda cyangwa uburyo babikoramo.
Dore ibyo wakwitaho kugira ngo utangire kubaka ubwo busabane n’umwana wawe utwite.
Ni ryari umwana uri mu nda atangira kumva?
Nk’uko Ishyirahamwe ry’Abaganga b’Abagore n’Inda muri Leta Zunze Ubumwe za Amerika (ACOG) ribisobanura, umwana uri mu nda ashobora gutangira kumva amajwi hafi y’icyumweru cya 18 cyo gutwita. Uko inda ikura, ubushobozi bwe bwo kumva amajwi burushaho kuzamuka.
Hagati y’ibyumweru 25 na 28, umwana aba ashobora no kumva amajwi amenyereye akoresheje ingendo z’umubiri.
Ubushakashatsi kandi bwerekana ko umwana ashobora kumenyera bimwe mu biranga ururimi yumva akiri mu nda, urugero nk’imiterere y’amajwi n’injyana y’ururimi. Ibi bishobora kumufasha gutangira kumenya ururimi amenyereye amaze kuvuka, nubwo bitavuze ko aba asobanukiwe amagambo yose avugwa.
Ni yo mpamvu umubyeyi ashobora gutangira kuganiriza umwana we akoresheje ijwi risanzwe, kumuririmbira cyangwa kumusomera inkuru, atiriwe ategereza ko inda igera ku mezi menshi.
Uburyo 7 bwo kuganiriza umwana uri mu nda
1. Jya umuganiriza ukoresheje ijwi ryawe
Ntibisaba amagambo yihariye cyangwa ibiganiro biteguye. Ushobora kumubwira uko umunsi wawe wagenze, ibyo uteganya gukora cyangwa uko wiyumva.
Urugero, ushobora kumubwira uti: “Uyu munsi ndagiye gutegura ibyo tuzakenera. Ntegereje umunsi tuzabonana, kandi nzakomeza kukwitaho.”
Icy’ingenzi ni uko ubikora mu buryo busanzwe kandi butaguhangayikisha. Kuganiriza umwana bishobora no kugufasha kumutekerezaho no kwimenyereza inshingano zo kumwitaho amaze kuvuka.
2. Jya uririmbira umwana indirimbo ukunda
Kuririmbira umwana uri mu nda ni ubundi buryo bwo kumugezaho ijwi ryawe. Ushobora guhitamo indirimbo zituje, indirimbo zo mu muco wawe cyangwa uturirimbo gakondo wakuze wumva.
Ushobora kujya umuririmbira mbere yo kuryama, mu gihe uruhutse cyangwa igihe wumva ubikeneye.
Ubushakashatsi ku majwi n’umuziki umwana yumva akiri mu nda bwerekana ko ashobora kumenyera amajwi amwe.
Icyakora, ntibivuze ko kuririmba byonyine bituma umwana azavuka afite ibyishimo cyangwa ubushobozi bwo kuvuga bwihariye.
3. Jya umusomera inkuru cyangwa ibyo wanditse
Nubwo umwana atarasobanukirwa amagambo nk’umuntu mukuru, ushobora kumusomera inkuru ngufi, imigani, ibisigo cyangwa ukamubwira amateka y’umuryango.
Ibi bituma umubyeyi agira umwanya wo gutekereza ku mwana no kumuganiriza, kandi bikamufasha kwimenyereza gusomera umwana no kumubwira inkuru amaze kuvuka.
Ntibisaba kuba umuhanga mu gusoma cyangwa kwandika.
Icy’ingenzi ni ugukoresha ijwi risanzwe no kwishimira uwo mwanya.
4. Jya wita ku byo urya n’ibyo unywa
Kwitaho ibyo urya n’ibyo unywa ni ingenzi ku buzima bw’umubyeyi no ku mikurire y’umwana uri mu nda. Hitamo indyo yuzuye kandi ikungahaye ku ntungamubiri, ukurikize inama uhabwa n’abaganga bakurikirana inda yawe.
Irinde inzoga n’itabi, kuko bishobora kwangiza ubuzima bw’umwana. Niba hari imiti ushaka gufata, banza ugishe inama inzobere mu buzima.
Nubwo ibyo kurya atari uburyo bwo kuganiriza umwana mu buryo butaziguye, ni igice cy’ingenzi cyo kumwitaho no kumurinda kuva inda ikiri nto.
5. Jya uruhuka kandi wihe Ituze mu mubiri
Mu gihe cyo gutwita, ni byiza kubona umwanya wo kuruhuka, gukora imyitozo yoroheje yemerewe umugore utwite no kwita ku buzima bwo mu mutwe.
Ushobora kwicara ahantu hatuje, ugahumeka neza kandi ugafata akanya ko gutekereza ku mwana wawe. Ushobora no kumuganiriza muri uwo mwanya.
Ibi bishobora kugufasha kuruhuka no kwita ku mibereho yawe muri rusange. Icyakora, ntibisimbura ubuvuzi cyangwa inama z’abaganga.
6. Jya umuganiriza ku byo ubona mu buzima bwa buri munsi
Mu gihe ugenda, uri mu rugo cyangwa uri gukora imirimo isanzwe, ushobora kuvuga ibyo uri gukora n’ibyo ubona.
Urugero, ushobora kuvuga uti: “Uyu munsi ikirere ni cyiza. Ndimo gutegura ibyo tuzakenera mu rugo.”
Nubwo umwana atabona ibintu byose ubona, ijwi ryawe rishobora kumugeraho uko ubushobozi bwe bwo kumva bugenda bukura.
Ibi ntibisaba gahunda idasanzwe. Ni uburyo bworoshye bwo kwimenyereza kuganiriza umwana no kumutekerezaho mu buzima bwa buri munsi.
7. Tegura ibintu uzifashisha umaze kubyara
Ushobora gufuma agatambaro, kuboha akagoferi, gutegura imyenda ye cyangwa gutunganya aho azaryama, ukabikora utekereza ku byo uzamukenera amaze kuvuka.
Mu gihe ubikora, ushobora no kumuganiriza cyangwa ukaririmba indirimbo ukunda.
Ibi bishobora kugufasha kwitegura inshingano zo kurera no kubaka umubano n’umwana wawe. Ariko gukora ibi bikorwa byonyine ntibivuze ko bigira ingaruka zihariye ku mikurire ye akiri mu nda.
Ibyo ugomba kwitondera
Kuganiriza umwana uri mu nda ntibigomba kuba ikindi kintu kiguhangayikisha. Nta mubare wihariye w’iminota usabwa kumuganiriza buri munsi, kandi ntibisaba kugura ibikoresho bihenze cyangwa gushyira utuvugirizo hafi y’inda.
Ijwi risanzwe rya nyina rirahagije.
Irinde gushyira utuvugirizo cyangwa ibindi bikoresho bisohora amajwi menshi cyane hafi y’inda, kuko amajwi akabije ashobora kugira ingaruka ku mwana.
Nanone, niba udashobora kuganiriza umwana buri munsi, ntukwiye kwicira urubanza. Icy’ingenzi ni ukwita ku buzima bwawe, gukurikiza inama z’abaganga no kwitegura kumwakira mu buryo bushoboka.
Kuba umubyeyi bitangirira mu rugendo rwo gutwita, aho umubyeyi agenda yitegura kwakira no kwita ku mwana we. Kuganiriza umwana uri mu nda, kumuririmbira cyangwa kumusomera inkuru ni uburyo bworoshye bwo gutangira kubaka ubusabane na we.
Nubwo ubushakashatsi bwerekana ko umwana ashobora kumva no kumenyera amajwi amwe akiri mu nda, ntibivuze ko ibyo bikorwa byonyine byemeza ko azavuka afite imivugire myiza cyangwa imyitwarire runaka.
Icy’ingenzi ni ugukomeza kwita ku buzima bwawe n’ubw’umwana, kwishimira urugendo rwo gutwita no kwitegura kumwakira no kumurera amaze kuvuka.
