Tricks Youth Are Using in Sexual Relationships to Avoid Responsibility

It is increasingly common to hear young men say they have no girlfriend but have a girl with whom they share physical needs like sexual intercourse, treating each other like lovers without a committed relationship that could lead to marriage.

This has led to demeaning expressions among youth, such as “Why buy the whole cow when you can get the milk for free?” implying that if sex is easily accessible, there is no reason to plan for marriage.

Common Arrangements Among Youth

Terms like “Hit and Run,” “Situationship,” and “Friends‑with‑Benefits” are widely used by youth to describe relationships that mimic couplehood but avoid responsibility.

A situationship is when two people appear to be in a relationship, even having sex, but they know it is undefined and has no future direction. Hit and Run refers to casual encounters, sometimes with acquaintances or strangers, where sex happens without planning and no further contact follows. Friends‑with‑Benefits is when two friends add sexual activity to their friendship, agreeing it is not love, respecting boundaries even if one has another partner elsewhere.

Research Findings

Lisa Wade, a professor at Tulane University in the U.S., studied 150 students between 2020–2021 to understand their views on relationships. She found many young people avoid showing their true feelings about committed love, which is why many end up in situationships. Problems arise when one partner develops deeper emotions while the other sees it as casual.

The U.S. National Institutes of Health reported in 2022 on research at Mbarara University in Uganda. It showed that many student relationships are situationships, often focused on sex rather than genuine couplehood. The study of 64 students revealed that some young women dated older men, sometimes for financial reasons, while some young men admitted to hit‑and‑run encounters purely to satisfy sexual desire or due to peer pressure.

Risks and Consequences

All these forms of relationships carry serious risks, including sexually transmitted infections, unintended pregnancies, emotional distress, and other harmful consequences. While they may seem convenient for avoiding responsibility, they often leave lasting impacts on health, emotional well‑being, and the ability to build stable families.